


Day 9 - Goodbye My Lover

by torigingerfox



Series: Sounds Good Enough [9]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Past Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-01
Updated: 2017-12-01
Packaged: 2019-02-09 04:25:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12880134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/torigingerfox/pseuds/torigingerfox
Summary: Sometimes the Past comes knocking on your door, in the form of a newspaper article.And sometimes, it's difficult to ignore it and let go.





	Day 9 - Goodbye My Lover

**Author's Note:**

> Day 9
> 
> Song: Goodbye My Lover - James Blunt
> 
> Rating: T

 

**Hermione's Home, London**

Hermione was busying herself in the kitchen, toasting bread and brewing tea, while Ron happily munched on a double chocolate muffin and sipped his coffee.

"Ohi, Hewmowne," he called before swallowing, eliciting an eye roll from the brunette witch. "Look here! Malfoy got married to Astoria Greengrass yesterday!" He leafed through the article, complete with moving pictures and interviews, and scolded, "Of course the git made it to the front page, I wonder how much he paid…," he trailed off, shaking his head.

_He what? No, no. It's not possible, he can't have married._

She hastily grabbed the newspaper from Ron's hands, ignoring his, "Ohi, Hermione! Couldn't you wait your bloody turn?" and stared at the headline, nearly unable to breathe.

" **MALFOY HEIR MARRIES YOUNGER GREENGRASS SISTER IN LUXURIOUS CEREMONY BY THE SEA"**

Hermione snorted. The location was all Astoria's doing, she was sure. Draco hated the seaside with a passion, she really couldn't picture him getting married on a shore. She actually couldn't picture him getting married  _at all_.

"-stry now. Hermione? Are you actually listening to me?" asked Ron, a hint of irritation in his voice.

"Oh, I'm sorry Ron," she apologized absentmindedly, "I didn't catch that. What did you just say?"

He got up and put his robes over his Auror attire, "I said, I'm heading to the Ministry now. What are your plans?"

Hermione cleared her mind long enough to say, "I have the morning off. I'll just go buy a #couple of new books and join you for lunch."

He shrugged his shoulders and planted a kiss on the top of her head, then placed his mug on the table and left.

_Oh Draco._

" _Why didn't he at least tell me? I should owl him my congratulations, probably…,"_ she thought while running her finger on a picture of Draco hugging his best men, Theo and Blaise. He was as she remembered him, maybe even more handsome, now that he had no hollow cheeks or black circles under his eyes.

The war had been hard on all of them, but it had been worse for him. Being a turncoat had taken its toll on him, and she remembered the absolute respect she'd felt towards the blonde wizard at the time. He'd risked it all to protect them when they'd been abducted and taken to Malfoy Manor, and she'd started seeing him under a different light.

How could she forget all those nights sitting on the porch, in their safe house. They'd talk about their lives, about their fears and about their dreams. How could they  _not_ fall for each other? He was all she didn't know she needed, a balm for her body and soul.

The first time they kissed it was raining and they'd just gotten lost in the suburbs of London. He was laughing and pulling her towards the nearest cafe, while she was feeling silly for getting lost so easily. They'd sheltered under a passageway and he'd pulled her close, the both of them shivering from the cold and the excitement. His eyes were steel grey pools, but his gaze was warm. He'd tilted her chin up and inhaled her scent, before finally resting his lips on hers, kissing her softly.

She'd felt guilty only for a second, thinking about Ron and his sheepish smile or his indecision, then she lost herself into his embrace and fiercely kissed him back. After all, Ron never made any kind of advances and Draco was so... _intense._

How could she  _not_ fall for him?

It hadn't always been sunshine and rainbows, what with the war raging throughout the country and both their tempers, but it had been  _real_. The sort of romance that consumed you, burned your insides and made you crave for more.

She often wondered how he managed to push her limits and turn her into a wild, reckless, and fierce version of herself.

They did some pretty wild things together, she thought.

She smiled to herself, while she thought of the night they survived an ambush and he dragged her into a Muggle pub to celebrate the fact that they were both still alive. She'd tried ordering a beer.

" _Really, Granger? You just survived an attack and all you order is a beer? The drinks are on me, but I insist you choose something stronger. A cocktail, for example"_

_Hermione leafed through the cocktail list and pointed her choice to the waitress._

" _I didn't strike you as a Cosmopolitan type," he said raising his eyebrow, then turned towards the waitress. "I'll get a Rum and Coke, please."_

They ordered five cocktails each, and by the time the pub was closing, they were both royally pissed. They'd started making out at the table, the other customers sending amused glances towards them. Once outside, they got a taxi and couldn't stop kissing frantically for the whole ride.

She'd woken up the morning after, with a Guinness World Record headache and no recollection of how they both ended up in her room, safe and sound.

She smiled again, despite the bitter taste in her mouth and the tears that threatened to spill. The only thing she could think of was  _How could he do this?_

She could practically hear him in her head.

" _That's a little hypocritical coming from you, Granger,"_ he'd say.  _"You married Weasley, after all."_

Yeah, she did.

After the final battle, she'd witnessed Draco walking towards his mother and hugged her fiercely. Hermione never thought there'd come a day when she'd witness Narcissa Malfoy fall apart, but it happened, right in front of her. And she'd never forget how Lucius had rested his hand on Draco's shoulder and kissed his son's head.

She hadn't noticed she'd been crying until her vision got too blurry and she was forced to wipe away her tears. Draco had turned towards her and threw her an apologetic look, while his mother still held him protectively and his father narrowed his eyes at her.

They probably held her responsible for Draco's decisions, and in that moment she understood that it couldn't go on. They were both tired of fighting, they didn't have it in them to fight anymore, and that it was it.

They'd both been too weak, they'd both been wrong.

_He looked haunted, raking his fingers through his pale hair nervously. "I'm sorry I disappointed you, Hermione. I never meant to deceive you...even though, deep down, I knew we couldn't be. I saw you falling in love with me, and I did nothing to prevent it. On the contrary, I let myself go, and I let you in. I claimed your body and your soul, in a selfish attempt at feeling alive again. And it worked, my love. You saved me from the darkness and you kept me sane, and we may be over but my love won't fade. I will always be there for you, and we might part ways but you'll always own my heart and my soul."_

_Hermione was sobbing uncontrollably and couldn't process what was going on, but before she could say anything, he cupped her cheek and whispered, "Can't you see it, Hermione? You changed my life. What we had, it was more than words could ever tell...but I can't keep fighting. Not against my family, not now...I'm so tired. And you make me stronger, but...you're addictive, and addictions never end up well, Hermione. We would burn and I don't want you to be consumed by...us. By me. I love you, but I have to say goodbye. And please, Hermione, move on. Be happy. Remember what we had, remember me, but don't let our memory prevent you from living"._

Hermione wiped away the tears. She'd have to get a grip and stop crying if she wanted to send him a note, lest she stained it with tears. After all, there was nothing she could do to change the past.

_What do you write to the love of your life who just happened to marry another woman?_

Hermione dipped her quill, decided to keep it simple and lighthearted. She hadn't spoken with him for the past five years and there was no way to tell how he'd react to a note from her.

_Dear Draco,_

_I've heard you got married._

_Congratulations, I wish you happiness and I'm happy for you._

_Hermione_

She owled her note and walked upstairs to get dressed, not expecting to receive a reply. Not even ten minutes had passed when she heard a tapping on her window.

She let her family owl in and, with trembling hands, untied the parchment from its leg.

_Dear Hermione,_

_Thank you for your words. Actually, your 4th anniversary should be soon, amazing how time flies! I wish you all the best as well, but most of all I wish you a life of happiness and love._

_Draco_

He'd replied. The note Hermione was clutching desperately, as if her life depended on it, had been held by him, his elegant hand had written those words.  _Oh, Draco._

Before she could think about what she was doing, she grabbed another piece of parchment and penned another reply. It was such a stupid idea, and yet she couldn't stop.

_Draco,_

_Time flies indeed. It seems only yesterday that we got ridiculously drunk in a Muggle bar, and now we're here dealing with married life. Anyway, thank you for you wishes...I can do nothing but return them._

_Hermione_

His next reply was even quicker.

_Hermione,_

_Oh my, I will keep the memory of that night stored away for when I'm feeling blue. It was hilarious, wasn't it? Anyway, thank you again. It's been wonderful, hearing from you._

_By the way, I was thinking...we could go out for a drink sometimes. I'd love to see you and catch up._

_Draco_

She knew she'd better stop it there, but she'd spent the past five years secretly craving for any sort of contact with him, and it was happening. She wouldn't let go the opportunity of feeling close to him a little more. Plus,  _he_ was the one who wrote he wanted to see her. Did he mean it, though? Or was it one of those things people said out of politeness? No, not possible. The Draco Malfoy she knew wouldn't write something he didn't mean.

_Draco,_

_I'd love to see you too._

_We certainly have a lot of catching up to do after five years._

_I wish you all the best and send my love_

_Hermione_

They were playing a dangerous game, the two of them. Hermione knew that under that layer of kindness and tranquility, laid a turmoil of emotions left unsaid.

She sighed, feeling a hollow ache in her chest, then put her robe on and headed downstairs.

She was about to Floo to The Leaky Cauldron and go to Diagon Alley, when she heard it.

_Tap. Tap. Tap._

Another owl? Well, it couldn't be Draco...what else could he have to tell her? She let the bird in and untied the roll of parchment.

_Hermione,_

_I'm finally at home alone._

_OK, I know I'm crazy, but...see me for a coffee?_

_Let's say in half an hour at that Muggle cafe close to Mayfair?_

_Reply only if you can't make it._

_Draco_

Oh,  _that_ was her Draco.

It was a bad idea. Possibly the worst idea ever. But she'd spend the rest of her life cursing herself for not going, if she didn't accept.

XXX

Her heart was pounding and she couldn't stop biting her lower lip nervously, while she stood in front of the cafe's entrance, too scared to take a step, too scared he wouldn't really be there.

But there he was, sitting at their table, reading his newspaper and looking more stunning than ever.

_Merlin, I've missed him!_

She was still glued to the same spot, when he looked up and saw her. He smiled, somewhat nervously.

So different from his usual smug and knowing smirks.

If there was someone able to hide his true feelings under a layer of suave coolness, it was him. But she knew him too well, she could read him like an open book. The way he was holding onto the folded newspaper on the table, af if it was the only way to keep his hands under control, the way he studied her with a playful look. Had she been anyone else, she wouldn't have noticed it was laced with caution.

She was a Gryffindor at heart, she wasn't good at feigning aloofness, and her fidgety hands were a proof. He'd see right through her, but there was no way she could control her emotions, so she responded to his grin with a shy smile, averting her gaze straight away.

She wasn't sure why she was there in the first place, she was married to Ron after all. But, Merlin, the pull to Draco was strong, and she didn't want a life full of what ifs and regrets. She didn't wanted it  _anymore_.

A million things were running through her head, because for Godric's sake she was Hermione Granger, and she over analysed everything.  _Weasley_. Crickey, how could she forget her own name after four years! The truth was, she might have been married to a Weasley, but she was still a Granger at heart. Her whole identity was tightly bound to that name. Seven years of being known by your surname left her feeling far more attached to it than her christian name.

And that's how Draco, who knew her so well, greeted her.

"Granger"

He wasn't trying to insult Ron, or remind her of her vows, he simply knew  _she was_ Hermione Granger, and that's who she always will be, whether her married name is Weasley or...or anything else.

"Draco" she sighed "Why are-"

"Hermione" he cut her off "Look...I can't do this anymore. Pretend that I'm over you, it's not working. I dream about you, then I wake and I think about you. You've always been the one for me"

Hermione's eyes shone with unshed tears "But, but Draco...you just got married and I- I don't understand…"

"My marriage?" he scoffed " A sham. Astoria is already cheating, she knows my head is somewhere else. And it is, Hermione. I'm constantly thinking about you, and we can't keep pretending. Five years ago I told you you should move on, and I've been an idiot. I should've known better...I feel so hollow without you. I want to see your smile, fuck I want to be there should you cry. I want to watch you sleep and I want to be the father of your children. I want to spend the rest of my life  _with you_. I know you're scared, I am too. But deep down you know that I'm right. I swear I never stopped loving you, and I swear I've never forgiven myself for letting you go. I cannot live without you"

That's all he needed to say, and she was stunned. For probably the first time in her life, Hermione had no words, and we most certainly wasn't expecting  _that_.

It was all too much, so she jumped up and ran away from him. From his intoxicating scent and his hypnotising eyes. Had she looked back, she would have seen his small smile, for he knew her well, and he'd imagined she would react like that.

XXX

Later, at home, Hermione Flooed her boss and asked for the rest of the day off. She didn't have it in her to face Ron, and she was in no condition to concentrate on her work.

Draco still loved her. He'd never stopped loving her, actually, and he still wanted her.

It seemed like the last five years never happened. The love of her life was back, claiming her and she was at a loss.

She still remembered the intense ache she'd felt right after he'd left her, and she wasn't sure she could go through that all over again. There were no guarantees it would work.

_Of course it would, he's the love of your life!_ said her inner voice, impatiently.

She was still lost in thought when she heard a tapping noise at her kitchen window, it was another owl. One she'd never seen before, at that.

The bird hooted impatiently, and Hermione hurried to open the window and let it in, then proceeded to untie a small, folded piece of parchment from its leg. Before unfolding it, she fed the owl a treat, lest it bite her.

She held the parchment in her shaky hands, too scared to read, to scared  _not to_ do it.

Sighing, she sat on the nearest chair and finally looked down at the note she was clutching.

_Search your heart, Hermione._

_You know we are worth fighting for._

_After the war, I thought I was tired of fighting...but for you I'd burn the whole world down._

_You are worth fighting for, and I will do it._

_So, same place tomorrow?_

_Draco_

Hermione smiled and pocketed the short letter, then before she could change her mind, she grabbed a fresh piece of parchment, dipped her quill in the ink bottle and began penning her reply.

THE END


End file.
